Redpaw,Apprentice,She-Cat

[angelkat]

Name:: Redpaw
Age:: 6 moons
Gender:: She-cat
Rank: Apprentice
Appearance:

Redpaw is a very pretty apprentice.Her paws are plain white.She has leopard type markings on her backside and down her legs and up her back slightly. Redpaw has a small scar on the back of her front left leg that is about 3 inches long. She has light yellow eyes that are very attractive some might say. Redpaw has spots behind her ears that are alittle bare on hair but its not a big thing to mistake her for.

Personality:

Redpaw is a very adventorous cat.She loves to chase,stalk and sleep.She loves taking care of any cat in the Clan.She usually shows-up the other apprentices because of her being talented.She can hunt well and she never gives up about anything.Redpaw is really smart about her surroundings.She knows almost every techniques for being a good apprentice. She is very loyal to her Clan and Clan-mates she wouldn't let down any cat in her Clan.

History:

Redpaw was born in a litter of 2,her twin brother died 3 days after he was born.Her mother died when she was only 3 moons and it put the father through hell to take care of Redpaw.Her father soon died of greencough when Redpaw was only 4 weeks after 3 moons.She was traveling by herself for 3 moons and when some mystery cat picked her up and dropped her off in EarthClan territory.Redpaw's life has been filled with horrible memories and dreams of her past with all the death.She hopes that her life will get easier while she's in the paws of StarClan and EarthClan.She will grow into a strong warrior with an intelligent mind for mentoring and maybe leadership,someday.She has been forgeting all her memories but some remain.

RP Example:

Redpaw slept lightly in the apprentice den.Her heart was beating slowly,her brain focused on the rythem of her heart.Her dream started out as a peaceful field filled with mice just for her to eat.It then turned into a dead weed field with bones and blood of cats and prey.She saw a light blow 3 fox-tail lengths ahead of her,it was her mother.Her mother was looking at all bones and blood in disbelief.Redpaw walked a few steps to her mother and then after the first couple of steps the field broke out into a loud battle field,filled with cats of all clans fighting and killing.Redpaw looked aroung her in terror watching the fights.A couple cats were killed right in front of her.She clenched her eyes closed from the horrible scence in front of her.She woke up screaming in apprentice den,she looked around her surroundings then sighed.She layed still trying to clam her heart that raced in her chest.

Other Cats:
Other::

[.::ئhatterstaՐ::.]

Mmk. We're not accepting cats just yet, but...Redpaw's great, accept that her appearance needs to be three sentences longer. This isn't SSM where you have fur color, eye color, and three sentences of other appearances. It doesn't say anything about her build, eye color, does she have any scars? Stuff like that. And Could you put spaces between your periods, like. This. Not like.This Sorreh, pet peeve xD

[angelkat]

lol..okay..sorry i had to go actually and forgot to put that i wasnt finished anyway
il fix everything later when im not too busy.

[angelkat]

Im done! Can she be accepted now?

[∂εstΐŋy]

Accepted!
-lockmove-
One suggestion I have is that you put a space a the end of your sentences after the period. It makes it look nicer

[/size]